


In a Sea of White

by Servena



Category: Band of Brothers
Genre: Angst, Bastogne, Coming Out, Conversations, Foxholes, Geographical Isolation, Homosexuality, Hopeful Ending, Internalized Homophobia, Isolation, Loneliness, M/M, Male Homosexuality, Military Homophobia, Period-Typical Homophobia, Plans For The Future, Snow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-30
Updated: 2019-09-30
Packaged: 2020-11-22 17:21:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20877884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Servena/pseuds/Servena
Summary: “Gene, I gotta ask you something.”





	In a Sea of White

After each fire exchange between Easy Company and the German Army on the other side, the forest of Bastogne is filled with a long, eerie silence. There’s not much do during these times, not much to occupy themselves but talk. Of course Gene will get up to do his rounds, but the snow keeps falling and it’s becoming easier and easier to get lost. And there’s only so many times you can clean a machine gun or sort through a medical kit before it drives you insane.

So they talk. They talk about anything and everything, their parents and friends back home over childhood memories to what made them become paratroopers (“I’d lie if I said the money had nothing to do with it”, Babe says.) Soon the snow is falling like a curtain, and from the exposed position of their foxhole right at the front of the line it feels like they’re the only people left in the world.

As expected it’s Babe who’s talking more, he gives a detailed description of his life in Philly and makes Gene chuckle with tales of his teenage misdemeanors. But surrounded by nothing but white it’s also easy for Gene to open up. He talks about his life on the Bayou, and about his grandmother, who’d meant a lot to him before she died. And Babe attentively listens to his every word and always finds the right thing to say.

Only the occasional cracking of a branch or a distant shot reminds them that they aren’t alone, that there’s a world out there and a war going on. But other times, it’s easy, maybe too easy, to forget.

It’s in this silence that Babe suddenly says: “Gene, I gotta ask you something.” There’s something urgent in his voice, and his hand is fiddling nervously with the blanket that’s covering both of them right up to their chins.

“Alright”, Gene says slowly. He’s got no idea what this is about, unless – the thought makes him tense up. It can’t be about that. Can it? No, it can’t be. He’s done nothing wrong, he hasn’t _done_ anything -

He’s so deep into his own thoughts that he almost misses what Babe is saying next: “And you gotta promise you ain’t gonna be mad at me if I’m wrong.”

Being mad is the furthest thing from Gene’s mind. He takes a deep breath to calm his racing heart before he says: “I promise.”

Babe’s gaze goes out into the field, as if there’s anything to see there, before turning back to him. “You ain’t got a girl back home, right?”

Underneath the blanket, he’s digging his fingernails so deep into the soft skin between his index finger and thumb that it hurts. That’s the question he’s tried to avoid since he enlisted, which is a hard thing to do when soldiers pass the photos of their sweethearts around after dinner. He guesses that it’s been only a matter of time before somebody would. “Nah”, he tries to say as casually as possible.

But Babe presses on: “You ever been with a girl?”

It wouldn’t be too weird to say no. He remembers like it were yesterday what Babe said about John Julian before he died: “The new guy in my foxhole is a goddamn virgin!” Paratroopers are older than enlisted men in the Army, but it’s still not unheard off, especially for a country boy like him. And still…

But they’ve gotten too close for him to lie to Babe now, so he just shakes his head. It’s not even like he can return the question, half the company has laughed about the “Dear Babe” letter he received just after shipping out from a girl named Doris.

Babe is chewing on his lips and he wants to tell him to stop before he’ll make it bleed, but instead he just watches the thoughts pass over his face. “Are you…” Babe begins, but then interrupts himself in the middle of the sentence.

“What?” he asks. He feels like he can’t breathe and if Babe doesn’t spit it out soon he might just have to shake him.

Babe laughs nervously, a sound that is strangely upsetting. “God, I’m messing it up, am I?” He rubs a hand over his face. “I’m sorry, I should just shut up.”

“Babe”, Gene says, trying to sound calm while he’s losing his patience, “what are you asking?”

Babe makes another effort. “I mean, are you…cause I am…you know?” he rambles, gesturing between them wildly.

It takes a moment for Gene’s brain to catch up. Then the tension snaps in an instant when he starts laughing. “Yeah.”

“Yeah?” Babe looks so relieved he might cry.

Gene nods. “Yeah.”

“Oh sweet mother of Jesus.” Babe sinks back against the wall of their foxhole. “I had a feeling, but I wasn’t sure, ya know. And I was afraid that you… that I was wrong. And then we wouldn’t be friends anymore.”

“We’re still friends”, Gene assures him as well as himself.

“That’s good”, Babe says with a smile.

But Gene can’t help but ask: “So what about Doris?”

“Oh that.” Babe makes a dismissive gesture. “I thought I’d make an effort, but it didn’t work out.”

“So I heard. Got a “Dear Babe” letter, huh?” he says with a slight smile.

Babe pulls a face. “Ugh, I’m never gonna live that down. Bill won’t let me.” He pulls the blanket tighter around himself and leans his shoulder against Gene’s. “Do you know about the others?”

“Depends on who you mean.”

“You know, the two resident drama queens for example.” He gestures behind them towards the other foxholes within the forest.

Gene chuckles lowly. “I know of those. They’re pretty obvious.”

“Yeah, I wonder how no one’s caught them yet.” He shakes his head. “I’ve got a hunch about a few others, but I’m not sure. And I know Liebgott is convinced Speirs is one of us, but nobody believes him.”

“Speirs?” He thinks about it for a moment. “I don’t know.”

“Yeah, me neither.”

Far to the west a shell can be heard whistling through the sky.

“Man, when this is over we should have a party”, Babe says wistfully. “You know, a party for guys like us.”

Gene’s heard about them of course, but… “Never been to one of those before. Not a lot of them where I come from.”

“I went once. Almost died of nerves.” Babe chuckles at the memory.

“I’m glad you didn’t”, he mumbles.

The silence between them is natural and comfortable. Huddled together like this, it’s almost warm enough to doze up. But then Babe disrupts the quiet between them. “We should go together.”

Gene looks up. “Yeah?”

Babe nods. “Yeah. After this is all over, we should go to a party together.”

Gene only thinks about for a split of a second. He knows that some consider it to be bad luck to make plans for afterwards. But when Babe is looking at him like that, wide eyes all full of hope, he just can’t say no. “Deal.”

It’s totally worth it for the bright smile he gets in return.


End file.
